Christmas Greeting

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

 

Hmm… How should I put this?… “Merry” Christmas?

On my way home I watched people in tents made of blankets on the muddy ground;beyond was a wreckage they once called home.

It’s sad… and it’s real. So to me, saying “Merry” Christmas just sounds awkward.

I mean no disrespect to the people who are suffering, but I am honestly happy right now.

Happy that my family and the people I care for are safe. Happy that I got to spend dinner with my boyfriend’s family and that they are getting settled in a new home. Happy to spend yet another dinner with my family and relatives.

Come to think of it, I am happy for a few other things as well…

Happy that I have found new friends at work. Happy for the blessings (no matter how small) that I received this year.

And of course, happy to learn blogging and meet all you nice people.

It’s not really a feeling of merriment but more of a feeling of thankfulness.

So, Thankful Christmas everyone!

P.S.

Thanks and have a happy Christmas to the following bloggers:

Mai (rest assured your family is okay, and take care of yourself in Manila)

Sam (thanks for being the nice person that you are and for your kind words of wisdom)

My2Pesos (thanks for continually commenting on my blogs no matter how boring they get)

CutestPrincess (for the friendly comments)

And to the rest of my followers who have made blogging an awesome experience for me. ^_^

Tragedy, Love, Drama

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

 

I don’t know if this news reached your side of the globe but the city where I come from experienced one of it’s most tragic floods.

Midnight, while people comfortably slept on their beds as the rain poured and the winds blew, the CDO River began to rise. It all happened so fast that in a matter of 10 minutes, the water inside riverside-homes rose from knee high to chest deep.

Well, I didn’t have any share of experience with the flooding because I live uptown. Instead, the rain that dripped from our ceiling and strong winds kept me up all night.

Honestly, the thought of family members and loved ones who lived in flood prone areas didn’t bother me so much then. I thought the rain would just go away and it wouldn’t do much damage. I was wrong.

Almost a hundred have been found dead with twice as many missing. Thousands have been affected, losing homes and possessions.

It felt like the end of the world when my boyfriend called me around 2:00am. The rain and wind was still so strong. He was stranded on the road with his family with no place to go because the river water at his place reached ceiling high. I was stranded at home with no electricity nor water.

The next few hours had been a battle field. He finding a place to stay and I worrying to death on where on earth he was.

His last message was that he and his family are staying at his uncles house and that he’ll go back to check his place during the daytime when the flooding subsides.

Today, no matter how hard I tried to busy myself with work, all I thought about was seeing him. He lost everything he owned to the flood. He said he’d go back to try and salvage as many things as he can. I wanted to keep him strong and positive. I wanted my self to be strong and positive.

I haven’t heard from him since his last message. I couldn’t reach any of his family members’ phone number either. So tried my luck and went to the place where he lived.

I just wanted to see him. There were so many people there; barefoot and muddy all over. Their belongings and animals filled with mud laying on the streets. Their children dirty with blank stares standing along the road. It was miserable.

It felt like the end of the world. Looked around and he wasn’t there. I tried to search as far as my eyes could see and failed to find him. I asked the locals if they’d seen him. One lady offered to text me if she finds him and tell him that I am at that spot looking for him. She was an angel. I didn’t even catch her name.

A few minutes later, I saw him from afar walking towards me. He looked devastated and tired. He was muddy and barefooted like the rest. From a few meters away, tears have already begun streaming down my cheeks.

I tried to correct myself. “Hey, you’re suppose to support him and keep him strong”. How stupid of me to be crying like that. But I couldn’t help myself. A few minutes ago it seemed impossible for me to find him amid that chaos. I was hopeless. Now that I finally saw him, it just made me so emotional. I cried for reasons I could not fathom.

(For Photos, Google search: Cagayan de Oro City Flood 2011)

Catch Up Blog

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

 

Whoa! It has been like what? a week? since I last posted a blog. I’m very sorry for all the missed posts, late comments, and well… missed out conversations with you…

So what have I been up to?

Sunday: Watched Breaking Dawn Part 1

And you thought I’d let that pass? Of course not! It would be like passing up on the cake at a birthday party. Okay, to be fair, I have seen all of the film franchise. But it wasn’t because I had genuine interest on seeing the film. It was more of; I don’t want to be out of place when people start talking about the movie.

This installment was no different. I sat on the theater to see what was expectedly a boring movie. Indeed it was boring. The previous installments had the occasional screams whenever Taylor Lautner would take off his shirt. This time there were none. Maybe it’s because that time it was considered child abuse (he was under 18 then) and thus this time it’s no longer cool.

Kristen Stewart’s managed to maintain a distinct character for the movie. A lethargic teenager with below average IQ who seem to be high on some sort of drug all the time. I was particularly irritated by her acting, I think she confuses anxiety with fear. She looked liked she just peed herself as she walked down the aisle.

Oh, and there was this awkward scene with the werewolves too. I didn’t understand the dialogue at all. It was kind of a silly scene.

Overall, the movie was completely bland and boring; the dialog, the scenes, the acting… I’d probably slept if I didn’t think of how much was spent on the tickets.  :P

Monday was a work day as usual.

Tuesday: Our Company Christmas Party

Yes, a Christmas party in November. So whatever, they set the rules I just attend things. I had trouble finding something to wear since the theme was “Cosplay”. I ended up with this…

(please don’t judge ~_~)

oh and yeah, we partied till around 2am… let’s just say I didn’t have fun…

Wednesday: Watch BF Tennis Game

I haven’t gotten much sleep from my uneventful previous night. But then my boyfriend said he wants me to watch his tennis match. So I hobbled my way to the place and just took pictures.

Thursday: Snuck out to Jobs fair

I filled for a half-day leave at work to pay out some bills and do some errands. I also dropped by the City Tourism Hall to take a peek at the job vacancies and stuff.

Friday (today): Fall out Sickness

Now I’m blogging while I chug a mug-full of ginger ale down my throat. Hope I don’t come down with a flu… I need to get my energy back ‘coz next week I’ll be on duty in another department. The sales department.

Eloping for a Day

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

 

As I promised last blog, I’ll be telling you about my somewhat “Breaking Dawn” trip.

I kind of hesitated about this since I’ll be posting pictures and I’m shy. But what the heck! Blogging is freedom anyway so here goes.

I went to Camiguin Island; my boyfriend’s  hometown. It was my very first across-the-sea trip in a long time (my last trip was when I was 5 ~_~) . I was nervous. Nervous over the sea vessel ride and nervous that we’d have to spend 3 days with his parents. (I’m such a girl, I know) Of course his parents were very nice and gracious.

On our second day there, we spent the entire day together. We circumnavigated the entire island; just he and I on a motorbike. Somewhat like eloping (^_^).

 

I loved the way we talked as we passed by the beautiful island’s scenery. The quiet road, the clear blue sky, the wind on my face and his sturdy back to lean on…

It felt like a scene from a movie ^_^

 

We then hopped onto a boat to get to “White Island”. Where we just enjoyed the beach and each other’s company.

 

We had picture taking. I told him, “someday, when we’re old, fat and wrinkly, we’ll see these pictures and tell our snotty kids, we were sexy people once ^_^” LOL

 

 

We then headed off back on the road to more destinations.

The “Ardent Hot Spring Resort”.

The “Sunken Cemetery”.

The “Old Church”.

We had planned to go to other locations but we had little time to spend and we didn’t want to travel at night. So we just watched the sun go down as we drove on the motorbike by a seaside road .

It was indeed a very beautiful day. A day which is now part of our memories together…

Back from a Break

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

 

It’s good to be back! ^_^ How have you all been? Oh my… I probably missed a whole lot of blog posts. Sorry, I won’t be able to check all of them out. I did skim a bit and realized that a lot of your posts recently were about the movie “Breaking Dawn Part 1”… Whoosh~ I missed the premier too?!!

If you don’t know, I am a big movie junkie. My boyfriend and I are. In fact we have a photo album for movie tickets. We love watching the movie and discussing the plot after. He likes to read the book versions too (if the movie is an adaptation) I like tracing the writing style and intricacy of the story. After all, I do hope to be able to write my very own book someday.

Well, I don’t have much to say because my mission for  the kittens was a fiasco. So instead, I decided to have a “Breaking Dawn” adventure of my own. (Minus the love triangle of course!)

I’ll tell you all about the trip on my next post. ^_^ Here’s a sneak preview.

Those are my feet. ^_^

Beautiful Scenery~

My own spider-monkey on the tree ^_^

Out on a Mission

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

 

Due to some circumstances, the photo challenge (supposedly daily) will have to be placed on hold for a couple of days.

Three kittens have appeared to me this morning and have asked for 3 highly confidential wishes; which I am supposed to grant them.

With this I have allotted a day for each kitten to deliver the wish he/she/it asked for.

Thus, I will be out on a mission for 3 days and no blogging is allowed for better concentration.

I will leave you with the thought of me; mounting a dragon that flies across the seas, riding a unicorn through a stretch of shimmering white sand; jumping off a waterfall within a lush green forest…

If I fail, those poor kittens will be placed in a sack hung on a tree, smoked with a bonfire beneath it, and  beaten with a stick.  ~_~

If I succeed, these kittens will be freed from slavery!

Adios! See you in three days~

=^.^=      =^o^=     =^O^=

Girls: The Myth

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

 

I’ve been posting blogs for a blog challenge called ‘ABC Blog Challenge’ which I came up with after realizing that I’m quickly running out of topics to write about. As I posted the list of random words with the fist letters starting from A to Z, My2Pesos pointed out that I won’t be writing about ‘Girls’.

One of the post the I made for the challenge is entitled ‘Boys: the Myth’. So this will be the girl version as especially requested. (you may post a blog request or challenge on this page Blog Challenges )

 

Girls, or the female species were once free and majestic creatures of the earth. That is, before the alien race invaded…

 

 

They come from a pearl-like egg, found inside a shell much like a seashell. The only difference is that these are remains of their predecessors. How long it takes before these pearl-like eggs hatch? A year… ten years… a hundred… no one really knew.

They are amphibians. The longest part of their lives are spent in the ocean. Half of their body is flesh, while the lower half is a scaly fish-like tail of  beautiful blend of colors.

They like the company of their own specie. They live in clans and dwell in caves and rocky shores. They like adorning it with flowers, colorful seaweeds, shells and many other things. You see, the more beautiful the cave or shore is, the more likely others of their own kind will be drawn. And like I said, they enjoy being with their kind. They are also very caring and nurturing by nature in the same way that they do to all their clan members.

As gentle as they are; they are also very competitive. Eager to have more in clan numbers, eager to have a more beautiful caves. Loyalty is also highly considered by their specie. Once branded disloyal, they are banished from the clan and left to fend for themselves alone.

 

At a certain time, they must leave their clan and bury themselves in the sand for months allowing the scales to wither and legs to fully develop. Rising from the sand, they begin their journey through dry land. They must find nutritious fruits to nourish their bodies before journeying back into the ocean to wither. Only the well nourished bodies can produce produce eggs and assure the continuance of their specie.

Life on land is treacherous but they have the developed power of intuition to adapt to these harsh condition. They collect beautiful stones called gems as a reminder of their great journey.

Nearing the end of their years, their skin will become shrunken and wrinkly, signs that they must return to the ocean. They bury their legs in the ocean bed and slowly wither and shrink becoming shell-like corals.

 

What do you think of girls reader?

Sleep Attack!

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

 

Yes, it is 1am… and no, I did not forget about the blog. I’ve already finished writing it yesterday actually (though technically, today is tomorrow because it is already 1am) but I won’t be posting it today for something of far greater importance.

I’m quitting blogging.

Gotcha! LOL~ Just kidding… ^_^

No, seriously, the reason why I’m blogging right now is because I want to get my eyes back to “sleepy mode”.

I’ve been having these ‘sleep attacks’ lately. Like for example today:

6pm I was going on and on to my mom about how good dinner would be and that I can’t wait to get home and eat.

7pm we got home. I soaked my laundry to wash later and turned on my computer to buff my daily fill of vlogs.

7:15pm I picked up some things on my bed

‘SLEEP ATTACK’ = blackout

12:30pm I woke up on my bed. I haven’t washed up and heck! I missed dinner completely!

1am I finished washing up and doing the soaked laundry like a zombie.

1:30am Snap! I’m awake like it’s the middle of the afternoon. I’m hungry but I’m afraid if I ate I would probably be awake until 3am

Now back to the blog…

So yeah, I think I have a sleeping problem (hey dirty-minded it’s not the other sleeping problem) I think the graveyard shift that I had last weekend may probably have something to do with this….

I just want to sleep~ heellppp~

 

How about you reader, have you ever experienced ‘sleep attack’?

My Apologies…

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

This isn’t the blog for today but I just would like to take some time to apologize for not being able to post daily or every other day which is my ideal frequency of posting blogs… ~_~ I really do want to post as often as I could, but lately I get home and just crash on to my bed.

The times I’ve attempted to write a blog; I woke up the next day to find my laptop beside me and all I’ve written was “Hello Gorgeous Reader!”…

I suppose this is yet another roadblock for bloggers… (the first is not having topics to write about) And this; not having the time to post blogs promptly.

I don’t know how I’m ever going to solve this since my work schedule have just been all over the place… But of course I’ll never know until I try right?

And on top of that I also changed my URL from (http://jooginz.blogspot.com) to (http://indistinctivewriter.blogspot.com) which turned out to be such a huge mess! ~_~

I do hope you (gorgeous reader) and especially my freakin’ gorgeous followers would still read my blogs and comment (pwetty pwease? *_*)

Anywhozzles bamboozles… Today’s blog will be up in a bit. ^_____^

Thoughts to Ponder On

 

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

I was about to write the next item on my blog challenge… But what the heck, I’m too tired to even keep my eyes open for three minutes! ~_~

So I’ll just leave you with a thought to ponder on for today….

“If your happiness makes another person miserable, can you be truly happy?”

 

P.S.

You are not mistaken. This is indistinctive writer’s  blog not my day in a sentence’s. The next post for the blog challenge will hopefully be up soon. ~_~

When All Else Fail; Just Cry

 

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

Today is not one of my best days. So I’m just going to make this blog simple.

It’s the first day of my production hands-on training. I tried to start the day right by waking up early. But I still made my mom miss her bus ride.

I got to the production area early. Too early in fact that I waited for an hour before all the other trainees got there. ~_~

I had a mess of a training there from kneading the dough, to cutting, and even frying (which I am terrified of). It felt like a hundred degrees inside the work area. I was tired, hungry, nervous, and soooo exhausted. @_@

After half a day of hands-on training, we had an exam where I FAILED BIG TIME. I wanted to talk to someone but when I asked my boyfriend where he was, he said he was at the tennis court and that I should take care on my way home. So I went home.

I got home to find no one there and the house was locked and I had no keys. All I wanted to do was to crash onto the nearest bed and I couldn’t even take a seat! I was stranded outside the house for about an hour.

I just felt so tired from  the hands on training and so frustrated from the exam. And on top of that, there I was stranded outside…

I was so overwhelmed of how bad my day was that I just started crying (yes, literally crying like fool). So I just cried and cried until I realized how stupid I looked because our dog looked at me like that’s exactly what she was thinking…

 

What do you do when you’ve had the worst day reader? Do you cry like I do?

No blog today Excuse…

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

I’m sorry but I’m too disoriented to write a blog today….

I’m currently undergoing training for my day job as a Training Associate (I train service crews). It’s a production training and it is both physically and intellectually demanding. (And I’m not an intellectual person to begin with.. [I’m doomed! O_o] )

I need to memorize all these standard proportions, temperature, timing, terminologies, so on and so forth…

So the blog challenge will just have to wait.

I’ll just leave you with a video clip that I recorded when I got home today. (I had dinner at Mai’s btw… ^_^)

(This is just me trying to deflect my anxiety over the training thing…)

I neither know the lyrics nor the chords to this song. But this is the best I can give you today.

I’ll just read blog roll updates later… Good night/evening/afternoon/morning (wherever you are)


How about you reader; what do you do when you’re anxious about something?

The Dating Challenge

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

I just wanted to take a little break from the blog challenge and share some personal experience with you.

If you’ve read my previous blogs you’ll know that I’m in a relationship. We’ve been together for 6 years and running 7 this year.

For those of you who have been or are currently in a relationship, I think we could all agree that monotony is one of the factors that rips relationships apart.

If you do the same routine, talk about the same things, eat at the same place over and over again… dates just seem less special even when you’re with that special person.

Eventually, because lovers are bored with their monotonous routine, they’d end up finding other activities of their own. Although this is good to some extent, there is a great tendency that this would lead to conflicts.

Case in Point:
“You don’t have time for me”
“You’d rather spend time on other things”
“I’m not as important to you anymore”
“You don’t love me anymore”

Going back the challenge , I asked my boyfriend to come up with interesting ways to date (I'll also be coming up with ideas too) which we could share with you readers hoping that it would give you some ideas to make your relationship ever blooming. ^_^

DATE 1: “A DATE ABOVE A STREET”

He brought me to a restaurant where you dine on top of a street (literally!) I mean you could literally see the cars driving by underneath you!

It was nice though… It was drizzling at the time. I don’t know with you but I find watching traffic relaxing…

Ambiance: 4* It’s a unique place to dine. The tables on the terrace gives enough privacy and scenery at the same time. The lighting was okay as well. I had some jitters about stepping outside onto the narrow terrace but it was surprisingly sturdy.

Food: 3* The meals were good and budget friendly. One of our food crazes are shakes but their mango shake tasted a like it had too much ice and too little flavor. We also thought that their dessert was a little too pricy for the size of its serving.

Service: 2* Their crew was attentive and serving time was okay. However their floor was dirty and we even had to remind the server to pick up the fork on the floor  ~_~

Hearts: 4* I guess although it’s not a very fancy place; the place is romantic in general. Specially that it was a dinner date and it was drizzling. ^___^

 

Sunshine Award! *_*

 

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

Just about a month ago,  I ‘remembered’ I had a blogger account and started publishing a few blogs.

I never thought about people reading my blogs at first; let alone receiving awards!

I didn’t know it would be so much fun! I got to share my ideas with other bloggers and got to make friends with people from across the world (probably even from Mars? lol)

And I have one person to thank all of this (blogging and the Sunshine Award) for…

Mai Yang of  The Most Awesome Blog Title Ever

 

Thank so much the encouragement and for all the blogging tips and advice!

                ^______________^

 

 

Stay AWESOME!

 

 

 

The rules for this award: 

1. Thank the person who gave you this award and write a post about it.

2. Answer the following questions.

 

• Favourite Colour: Pink, Black
• Favourite Animal: Rocks (except for our dog of course)
• Favourite Number: 3, 9, 18
• Favourite Drink: Instant Coffee
• Facebook or Twitter: Facebook
• Your passion: writing ^_*
• Giving or getting presents: getting! (and of course giving when I can) 
• Favourite pattern: polka dots
• Favourite day: Restday!! LOL
• Favourite flowers: those given to me by my one and only ♥ ^_^

 

3. Pass it on to ten fabulous bloggers and send them a message to let them know..

Here’s My List of TEN!

Mark of Disjointed Ramblings of a Disjointed Person

CutestPrincess of It's a Girl Thing

MY 2 Pesos

Rifle of Software in Action

Linux and Life

Dwizzt of Why So Random?

Lemons Don't Make Lemonade

Foxzero of Anifex

JAlms of Salaula Sa Tinta

Max Power of Dumb Money

Blog Topics?

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

It’s almost 11 o’clock and I still haven’t posted a blog up…. You see, I had a whole day of asking questions that I’ve already asked about a hundred people before and it kind of just sucked all my creative energy…

The thing is… I’m having a writer’s block right now. So aside from telling more flimsy excuses about why I couldn’t decide on what topic to write, I’m going to write about how I’m going to over come this writer’s block thing.

Hmm… experience is the best bank to draw ideas from, but sorting out those experiences would be such a chore for me. Since I’m already too sleepy and tired to think of something interesting to  write about, I’m just going to have to go back to the basics; my ABCs

The following will be the topics that will hopefully get me through the next 26 days of blogging.

A- animals
B- boys
C- cars
D- drinking
E- endings
F- friends
G- ghosts
H- hobbies
I- internet
J- justice
K- kiss
L- life
M- music
N- necessities
O- opposites
P- people
Q- quiet
R- race
S- sadness
T- toys
U- understanding
V- vintage
W- wealth
X- X?
Y- youth
Z- Zoo

I’ll be blogging back tomorrow with at least something decent to read about alright?

How about you reader; what’s the most difficult part of writing for you?

Stereotyped: The times I wanted to be a…

 

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

Today I’ll be tackling one of the most cliché topics in modern society, which is stereotypes.

I guess everyone in my generation have seen those flicks and ads and TV series where there’s a jock, a nerdy guy, a cheerleader, a shy girl, a hopeless romantic dude and so on and so forth… Yes, I mean the Glee, Gossip Girl, Not Another Teen Movie, 10 Things I Hate About You, Clueless, and the ever epic Dawson’s Creek! In fact, even my favorite animé series are filled with stereotypes! (I love you Kaede Rukawa! LOL)

This has played such a huge role in my life that I would confess… I woke up one day believing I was Baby Spice (LOL)

Seriously though, I really did go through times when I wanted to be like these stereotypes. Here are a few of the stereotypes I wanted to be…. ^_^

“THE PRINCESS”

“Every girl wants to be a princess” (even some boys do~ lol) I’ve gone through a phase in my life where I joined every single pageant and events that start with the word “Miss”. I guess even when girls grow up, they still have the yearning for this. That’s why my mom encouraged me to join whatever the heck I wanted to join. Being a princess is like being pretty, and prim and proper, and wearing cute dresses, and entertaining people with your singing and dancing, and answering stupid questions like “Question: If you had to choose between being rich and being beautiful; what would you choose and why?” My Answer: I would choose both because I’m a freakin’ Princess and I get everything I want!” Sadly, when I grew up, I didn’t quite “reach” the expectations… (I mean LITERALLY ‘coz I’m like 4’8’’!) But it’s nice remembering those days… I guess I’ll just dump all my frustrations to the hands of my future daughter. ^_^

                                                                                                     “THE NERDY GIRL”

When I realized that I couldn’t be the damn princess no more, I figured “well, what’s the opposite of a princess?” Yes, it’s the ‘nerdy girl’. The nerdy girl is shy, and has few friends, and good in academics and doesn’t get a lot of suitors and a bit clumsy too. It was kind of easy for me to fit in this stereotype because I really am shy and clumsy. The academics part I had to work for though ^_^ (I don’t like talking about this but for this blog then I will.) I did graduate first honor of my elementary school batch. My parents were more excited about that than me. I had to give a speech and I fainted on stage because I was sick that day (low iron). I was truly embarrassed. I realized that even “nerdy girls” have to put up with high expectations from people. I still have the nerdiness in me but I don’t try as hard as I used to.

“THE CHEERLEADER”

I tried to battle my shyness in the company of DVDs and yet again it lead me to another stereotype; the cheerleader.

 A cheerleader is strong. A cheerleader is happy. A cheerleader stays optimistic, Yeah baby! A cheerleader is fun. A cheerleader won’t run. Because in her heart she stays number 1!!

Do I even need to explain why I wanted to be a cheerleader? I loved everything about it! The fun costumes, the dancing, the stunts, the crowd cheering while you perform. So even when my parents didn’t agree with me joining the squad (because I’m asthmatic) I insisted. It was an awesome experience. But it’s a phase that you just have to let go when you grow up…

“THE EMO CHICK”  

This stereotype became my obsession when I was unemployed, broke, and had no life. It’s not about the cutting thing (my gosh!) that caught my interest. It’s the edgy fashion, the “I don’t care” attitude, and the “go with your feelings” philosophy that I liked. It’s like “I’m a total loser and I feel awesome about it”.

However, if you truly want to live, you can’t always be a loner or an outsider and not care about the world. It takes wisdom to understand that each of us have responsibilities and we can’t just pass at whatever life throws at us . Or burden other people because we just want to do what we want to do. We have to learn how to live to let other people live.

                                                                                            “THE SEX SYMBOL”

I think most girls go through a stage in their lives where they want to feel sexy. I’m not saying I want to have sex. What I mean is that I wanted to be desired. To enter a room an turn heads. To be the envy of girls and the wish of men. To be able to look in the mirror and tell myself “damn I look good!”

But you know what, when you find that person, who’ll always make feel desired and beautiful just the way you are… you won’t even have to try.

So as you can see, I’ve tried to be someone in so many different ways. And I guess I’ll still be some kind of stereotype in the future. But the thing is; I’m real. I’m not a fictional character. I may have tried to be a stereotype from time to time but still that was all me. Different, but uniquely me.

 

How about you reader; have you tried to be a stereotype too?

Why I Hate his Ex Girlfriend

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

I’d like to share something that I’ve been keeping off my chest for a while now. You see, I strive to be a nice person. I know that’s so overrated but still I want to be nice.

However, one of the biggest roadblock to that is the fact that I hate my boyfriend’s ex-girlfriend.

We were just a few months together when I talked to him about going abroad to “find greener pastures” as others would put it. We were sitting in a jeepney on to way to my place when I opened up that topic. He didn’t look at me when he answered. He reasoned that couldn’t we have a good life in our own country?. I went on talking about better opportunities and blah blah blah… Finally he said in soft voice… “are you leaving me like my ex-girlfriends?” I fell quiet because of what he said. I placed my head on his shoulder and said… “Okay… (I looked at him and smiled) I’ll never leave you. I promise. We’ll grow old together, and go fishing in your hometown.” I knew how much he’d been hurt. From that moment on, I started resenting this girl.

Occasionally, I’d have moments in our relationship where I’d feel like I’m subliminally compared to her. I didn’t like that at all. Of course, I’d want to be loved for me. Not because I remind him of someone else. I'd ask him to pretend that he’s my friend (his alter ego) and I would tell him how I felt. He would assure me that I’m different and that he chose me over her. His words and his voice were the only things that appeased my weary heart on those moments.

Time passed and months turned to years. I couldn’t recall how but I found out that his ex-girlfriend sent him a personal message informing him that she’s getting married. I don’t know but it really bothered me a lot. I mean, what’s her motive for doing that? (guess for yourself and tell me on the comments) She could have just posted a group announcement if she meant for him to know, right? Why put so much effort to tell him personally? After all they’ve already broken up and he’s with me. That kind of made me feel a little pissed… (okay, I meant a LOT) Did she even consider how that would make me feel? how her husband to be would feel? I don’t know if you’d agree but I thought it was indecent of her to do that.

Then there was the time when she tried to add me up on Facebook. Of course there are only two choices: Accept and Deny. If I accepted her request; I would be stuck in a very awkward pretentious friendship where she would subliminally bruise my self-esteem by pointing out how much better she is at everything! Then I guess she’d be telling me about all the things she knows more about him and blah blah blah… so on an so forth… That would definitely make me feel like crap!. So I say NO! I don’t like you! And I don’t want to be your friend! I guess that would have others thinking that I’m bitter or insecure. But I needed to be honest with myself.

The worst that she made me feel was when I opened a Facebook video. In that video, the only people who were tagged was my boyfriend and his sisters. (In short, only his immediate family). And then, low and behold… she was the only other person tagged to that video! Oh! If you only knew how much I wanted to trash the computer! (LOL) I was infuriated! What is she trying to point out here? That she is part of his family and that I’m the outsider? (You bi%c#!! I thought to myself.)
At that moment, all the niceness in me flew out the window. That’s the last straw, I totally HATE her!

Until this day, I’m still trying to weigh if how I feel about her is reasonable… I tried to put myself in other people’s perspective but I still feel the same. I’d ask myself: Can’t she just leave us alone? Can’t she just move on with her life? Can’t she just have a little sense of decency for herself? (if not for herself, but for her husband?)

Oh! I don’t know gorgeous reader… Am I over reacting? How would you feel if you were me?

I’d still hate her though! (evil grin) :P

“Don’t Talk to Strangers”

 

Dear Gorgeous Reader!

I was at the mall this weekend (working ~_~). As I watched the shoppers flooding the hallways with bags and kids in tow; I heard one shopper telling her child a very familiar phrase… “Don’t talk to strangers.”

I’ve heard my parents tell me this many times when I was a child. In fact, I recall being lost in ‘Ororama Mega Center’ (a local shopping mall). I was about 4 or 5 years-old  then. I was standing near the entrance door, when a sales lady and a security guard approached me. They asked me questions like; “What’s your name?”, “Who are you with?”, and “Where do you live?”… I recall telling the both of them “I don’t talk to strangers.” (LOL!)

I closely looked at the lady talking to her son in crude English accent. She was slender, with brown skin and straight long black hair (qualities of an average Filipina woman). I panned my sight down to her son. A cute little boy, with very pale skin, blond hair, and sparkling blue eyes…

Meeting His ‘Wicked’ Sister

 

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

I guess most or all of my followers are followers of “The Most Awesome Blog Title Ever” whose writer is my boyfriend’s sister.

She recently wrote a blog to promote my blog-site

"Wicked Sister Meet's Brother's Girlfriend"

I guess I could recall a lot of awkward moments when I’m around my boyfriend’s family. Specially that we met as total strangers with only one common friend.

 

The day I met his sister:

I had been asking him about his family since he had already met mine for couple of times. One day, I received a text message from him saying that he wants me to have lunch at his place with his sisters. The first thought  I had was ‘OMG!’. I probably checked myself at every mirror on the way to his place [yes, including the parked car’s windows]. Probably lost 30 strands of hair from fixing it over and over. Bruised my lip from biting it out of nervousness. When I finally saw his sister, I secretly collapsed in my head…. While we ate, I tried my very best to eat as quietly as possible; sat like a military man and chewed like a poised lady. I looked in only two directions; up and down.

The day I met his parents:

It was his birthday. He said we’d drop by the church before having lunch at his place with his family. I was late as usual. I think I changed my clothes 7 times before leaving. (Not to mention bathing for two hours.) Before we entered the door to his house, I froze for 5 seconds that he had to tug my hand. And there I was… wearing pink blouse and white skirt. My hair tied in place with a white scarf-like cloth. I wore pink ballet flats and held a pink purse. And there they were… in their plain house clothes! (OMG!) I could tell how over-dressed I was by the way they looked at me… ~_~

The day we went to a wedding:

He invited me to be in his cousin’s wedding. It was the first wedding he was invited to ever since we were together. I learned my lesson this time. I didn’t over dress ^_^ I sat near the aisle beside his sister. I’ve seen them a couple of times already so I wasn’t as nervous as I used to be. When the wedding started, I looked at him standing near the groom and looking like the man of my dreams smiling back at me… my heart just melted…. Then his sister spoke to me… she said “You know when my brother gets married, I’m really gonna cry… Because his new wife would take him away from us”  I choked and smiled awkwardly… O_o

But you know, it’s not all that bad. I also have two brothers and I equally act awkward around their girlfriends. And… I think I’d also be kind of emotional when they get married….

I guess the best consolation is the fact that I can rest assured that if I marry this guy I’m sure to have decent looking kids because he does come from a family of good-looking people who are decent and act the way they feel around me.

I’d rather have a ‘wicked’ boyfriend’s sister act the way she does; than have someone act completely pleasant around me and talk crap behind my back. Wouldn’t you?

 

How about you gorgeous reader? Have you had awkward moments like me?

Life’s Little Ironies: Ice Cream

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

I’d like to share this photo with you…

I was out at a photo copying shop busily filling out a hand-full of papers. It was 10am and I haven’t had any food yet. However, I was more concerned about my job than my stomach being empty.

I tried to keep my balance with all the things I was carrying to wipe the sweat on my face as the shop’s air-conditioner was broken.

As I anxiously waited for the papers being copied, I looked through the glass door to see this….

It Starts Now!

Hello Gorgeous Reader!
If you have read my past blogs, you’d probably be getting an impression that I’m a bit pessimistic… Well, I guess there could be some sense to that.
You see, most of the time I tend to over think before deciding on something (especially when cash is involved   O_o ).
Usually I’d tell myself “well, you have this amount to buy this particular thing you want… but what if you save more so that you can buy something better?”
In many aspects of my life, I’ve put-off a lot of things that I’ve been wanting to do. Things like studying post grad, traveling , hobbies, or even meeting friends.
Lately I’ve come to realize that things aren’t going to get any cheaper. Everything will eventually just get pricier. The only thing that’s wasted is time.
So I’ve decided to stop planning and start doing. It starts NOW. Not tomorrow, not later, and not soon but NOW.
Last weekend, I started one of the many hobbies that I wanted to do; Painting. With encouragement from my inspiration, I bought a couple of things for this hobby. (yes, I’ve been wanting to buy these things for years!)

Oh I felt like a child opening presents on Christmas morning when I unpacked the shopping bag. I was so excited that they seemed to sparkle in my eyes. (LOL)
Then I went on to try them out. Here’s my trial painting…
(please don’t judge ^_^ I’m just an amateur)

Anyway, what I’m trying to say is that; I really felt a child-like sense of happiness from this experience. It kind of made me think that happiness doesn’t necessarily have to come from having expensive things. They come from being able to do what you love doing.

How about you? Do you have hobbies or plans that you’ve been putting off? Why?

Ooops I lied!

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

I just would like to share with you a very peculiar and awkward incident that I experienced almost a week ago...


I happened to be on an outside office business for my job. As I was on my way to another location, I bumped into a familiar face from my college years. I knew this person because he was the baggage guy from school. (You have to deposit your things before you enter the library).

Well I tried to be polite and respond with a greeting when he greeted me on the street. He asked me what company do I work for (because I was wearing uniform). I answered and asked back 'well how about you?' (trying to be polite again). He was like "oh just this hotel" trying to sound disinterested. "Wow, that's great" ['thinking to myself': for a baggage guy'].

Then starts the awkwardness....

He asked what provider do I use on my cellphone. I was like "oh this other line" (hoping to discourage him from asking my number) The most horrible words came from his mouth "can I have your number?" ['thinking to myself': shit! what do I do?] I was like.. "oh... okay, but you know I don't really text that much... so I hope you won't get offended if I don't text back" He said, "okay, what's your number?" I automatically replied, number number number... [oh, shit why the heck did I give my number!?] Then, I said, okay bye I have to go.

Then even more awkwardness...

He said, "can I come with you?" [what the hell are you talking about?] I was stunned for a moment because I thought it was creepy of him to ask. Then I said "I'm actually in the middle of work right now..." And right on cue, a jeepney just rolled by through the curve. [yes!] "Oh this is my ride, bye". I almost jumped and ran towards the jeepney entrance. When I finally sat down into the jeep I felt so relieved... [gosh... that guy was wayyyy creepy!]

When I looked back to see if I escaped from that creep... he was sitting right next to me in the jeep!! [my GOSH! can I please jump off this jeep right now?!]

"umm, what are you doing here?" "oh I said, I was going to go with you" he replied. "I said I was working." I replied firmly. (the jeep started to go) "oh, I didn't catch your name. what name will I put on my phonebook for your number?" [WHAT?] "what? you don't even know my name? And you asked for my number? Oh come on...." "I forgot your name..." he sheepishly replied. "So, what's your name?" he insisted.

Do you know... (I then enumerated a couple of my classmates names)... He said that a few of those names sounded familiar. I enumerated a couple more names. Then, I said "oh you know that last name that I said... that's me [that was NOT me]" I laughed. He totally believed it! LIE #1 [oh crap, I gave my old classmate's name to this bozo]

Looking out the jeepney, he asked "where is this place?". I replied "this is the way to where 'I'm going' you should get off the jeep on this curve" It seemed liked he wasn't listening. "I'll pay your fare." he said. I automatically replied "no, I'm fine. I have my own money." He took his wallet and opened it wide so that I could see the bills tucked inside (there was a 1 thousand bill) "oh, I didn't realize  that I don't have change". He chuckled. [GET LOST CREEP!!! : I thought to myself.]

"You really don't know me do you?" I chuckled too. "By the way, I gave you the wrong number" [it was my real number in fact] "that should be a 2 instead of a 5..." LIE #2 [sorry creep but I just couldn't stand the thought of giving you my number]. He said "oh thanks" (I suppose he thought to himself that I changed my mind because of his 1 thousand bill) "What do you do for a living by the way?" he asked. LIE #3 "I'm and auditor... you know I audit stuff.. " [wrong! I don't even know what the heck an auditor does] LOL!...

"Can I go with you to where you're going?"
Me: "no".
"Can we hang out sometimes?"
Me: "no".
He continued to ask more questions which I monotonously answered with "no"

[gosh how long will this creep keep talking to me?]

FINALLY, he recognized another person inside the jeep and started talking to that other person instead.

 And when he got off the jeep... it was as though the heavens opened and the skies shined down on me~ ^_^

Are You Satisfied?

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

Here I am again sitting in a dim lit room and trying to contemplate on my life. Well, this thought all started with a question I raised in a seminar facilitated by a colleague at work. A striking statement from the seminar went this way - "When you are able to do all that you've planned for the day; you will be satisfied"

I plan my day like this:
Wake-up
Work
Get home and do a little chore
Surf the net
Sleep

I asked the facilitator "Why is it that I've done all that I planned to do yet I'm still unsatisfied with my day?"

I really meant to say, "I'm still unsatisfied with my life..."

This feeling has been growing on me the past few days, no... the past few weeks, no... the past few months or years rather.

I really strive not to be the pessimistic type of person, but I do feel lost at times. I could say that I've lived by the rules. By rules subliminally mandated to me by other people and some which I had to live by. Which I enforced to myself like a jail-guard.

No to allergen food, no drinking, no gaining weight, no late-night outs, no clubbing (I swear not even once), not too much texting, and the list goes on and on... In fact, I've learned the skill to dodge people as well.

Now my world is so narrow that I could basically plan every single day just like my example above. So, yes, I have done whatever I planned to do...

But enacting plans don't always sum up to happiness...

I look at my past and I could say that I have done what I wanted to do... I have done what is expected of me.

So I finished a four year college degree in four years... So what? College undergrads make more money than I do working at call centers.

So I don't drink alcoholic beverages nor smoke... So what? I still feel like crap everyday!

So I tried to do give and do things right to be a good role-model (whatever the hell that means)... So what? That didn't make my parents love me.

I totally feel like Casper right now... like a ghost trapped in a hollow house.



Anyway... I'll be turning 25 in 3 months... So, what would you suggest that I do with my life to make it "satisfying"? O_o

A WANDerful Story

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

Exactly a week ago, I watched the last installment of a movie series that I started watching exactly a decade ago.

I recall my brother; a budding freshman, telling me about a book he borrowed from one of  his classmates. It had shades of purple and had a cute drawing of a boy who seemed to be riding a broom. I never had interest in books; I still don't. But this book was one of the very few books that I have read and actually finished reading. You see, it was the movie that drove me to read it. I watched it with my entire family then. I don't know if it was the adventure story or the out-of-this-world language (wingardium leviosa!) or the cute characters with an even cuter English accent; there was one word to describe it MAGICAL...

Throughout my teenage years it was the movie that we watched out for every year; much like a cult actually. But alas, the story that started with an ordinary tale ends with an epic battle between good and evil. I must say that the last movie gave it justice. I most specifically like the last part of the ending. The story that started with a boy ends with a boy. A happy ending. After all, that's all we really wish for in life.

Maybe someday there will be another great movie series. But I feel that this series is one close to my heart and one that would represent my generation. Just like 'Star Wars' represent that of my parents' generation. With this, I say... bravo! Harry Potter!

The Girl Behind the Fences

Hello Gorgeous Reader!

It's been a while since I last posted a blog. The have been many changes in my life since... I guess, the biggest change in my life was that half of the people that I lived with at home left.

I've never been good at showing emotions. I find it hard to make new close friends or be part of a new clique. You see, my childhood is not one that most kids from my neighborhood would recall.

I was the girl behind the fences...

I was a sickly child. I had asthma, allergies and a poor immune system damaged by prolonged medications. I used watch my siblings run in the dirt, laugh and sweat from child's play. I smiled every time they waved at me from afar. I didn't want to be pitied... after all, who would want that?

I was content with watching them play from behind the fences. But now, everything has changed...
I could no longer watch them from afar. Both my brothers have left to work away. One in Manila, the other in Pampanga. And on top of that, our nanny for 23 years had to live with her daughter because she was too old to be watching the house alone.

I've never spoken to them since they left... never even sent them an SMS... I know, "how cruel of me" right? Deep inside, there's a part of me that misses them a lot... But where do I begin? When I've spent my entire life keeping my emotions to myself... just.. watching from behind the fences...

Everyday I wish that I could say... "I hope you're doing okay there" and "I miss you". But whenever I try, an inexplicable fear overwhelms me.

For now, at least I am able to share this with you Gorgeous Reader...

I hope, to someday... be able to open the fences that cage my emotions...

               someday...

                           soon....



Post Script:
I would like to thank the person who inspired me to write today. I had a hard time acknowledging how I felt the past weeks. In a way... you have lifted my burden. Kudos to you! And more followers to come ^_^